LEHIGH VALLEY, Pa. — As The J. Geils Band once said, “Love Stinks.” But what can you do about it?
While the celebration of love might not be everyone’s cup of tea, it is ubiquitous — come February, you just can’t seem to escape all the hearts, roses and chocolates leading up to the biggest holiday honoring adoration.
Yeah, it’s Valentine’s Day.
But if you’re just not having it this holiday season, don’t be distraught—lean into it!
There are Lehigh Valley institutions that have proven you don’t have to be all lovey-dovey to enjoy Valentine’s Day in your own way.
So if you're not feeling all fuzzy and sentimental this Wednesday—and even if you are—remember, there are always options to celebrate in your own way with a special style.
A brew with a bit of bite
Looking for a drink with a bit of a spicy kick to offset the sweetness?
Birthright Brewing Company in Nazareth has you covered with a seasonal brew packing a bit of a bite with every swig of beer.
Its “Burning Love,” a strawberry and jalapeno Berliner Weisse, is the perfect pint, with brewmaster Wayne Milford saying it meets the sweet with the heat.
“Basically what we decided on was it was kind of like our spin of—it was like ‘Alright, so let's do something nontraditional … So there’s ‘Burning Love,’ like whether it's a painful relationship or not,” Milford said.
He said even a good relationship can have those spicy-hot moments.
If you’re picking up a four-pack, make sure to get yourself some strawberries. Milford recommends garnishing the rim of your glass so you can accent those subtle strawberry notes.
And don’t worry about the heat—you’ll definitely pick up on it once you take a sip.
On the other hand, if you’d like to enjoy something with more of a sweet treat bent to it, Birthright’s got another option for you.
“For Valentine's Day we're also doing a strawberry white chocolate white stout, to kind of play the other end of the spectrum as well," Milford said. "We have something for everyone."
“So for everyone celebrating great relationships and everything else, and you know, the other ones where it's like, ‘Ugh'…we’ve got a beer for everybody.”
Sassy, snarky, and oh-so sweet
Even if you’re feeling salty or spicy, a sweet treat for Valentine’s Day always is a good idea.
But if you want that chocolate cake to have a sassy bit of bite to it, swing by Vegan Treats, the bakery that has made it a point to add a strong dash of snark to its Cupid Day confections.
For Vegan Treats owner Danielle Konya, the standard fare for Valentine’s Day just won’t do. So bring on the “Fatally Yours” black heart chocolate boxes—an item that has become a sought-after collectable over the years—and other unorthodox ways to show that sometimes, love ain’t grand.
“This more macabre concept has extended to cakes and various other treats," Konya said. "Personally, I've always viewed Valentine's Day as somewhat cheesy, often finding myself scoffing at the traditional gifts of roses and teddy bears.
"It's not that I'm opposed to love; rather, it just feels more playful to whip up a cake with the words, ‘You'll Do,’ or make an exquisitely gorgeous box of chocolates that’s completely unexpected.
"This year we made an incredibly beautiful chocolate box in the shape of a coffin. We shipped them all over the world."
As for those cakes, there are plenty of delectable options: a Death By Chocolate cake doled out as a coffin, confetti cakes with cutting candy hearts—“Bite Me” and “XO NO” are just two examples—and a few more risqué treats you’ll have to visit the Bethlehem shop to see are just some of the irreverent offerings made for the holiday.
Konya said her top picks for gifts—either for yourself or a loved one—are the chocolate boxes “because of their unparalleled uniqueness and charm,” along with the 6-inch cakes which are defined by “just the right blend of sweetness and sass.”
And this year, Konya and her team have introduced something with a bit of a creepy-crawly touch for you cuddle bugs looking to “break away from the traditional Valentine's Day offerings.”
“There’s so many seasonal favorites to choose from," Konya said. "I thoroughly enjoy collaborating with my creative team to capture the essence of the holiday with fresh perspectives and innovative concepts.
“This year, we've introduced a cake featuring hand-sculpted ‘love bugs,’ as well as another showcasing sugar-sculpted leeches, accompanied by a social media post playfully asking, ‘Who are you 'stuck with' this Valentine's Day?’”
So whether you’re celebrating the day with someone you love, or recovering from a broken heart, you can treat yourself to something sweet with a touch of sarcasm this week.
“Practicing self-love is profoundly empowering,” Konya said. “Many of our customers purchase our chocolate boxes for themselves.”
Sometimes, love really does stink
Oh, heartbreak… Sometimes it’s just too much to deal with all the love in the air this time of year. Perhaps you would rather be spending time with your precious pooch than any other human.
Well, if you’re an animal lover, there’s a cheeky way you can support a Pen Argyl rescue while enjoying a bit of catharsis this Valentine’s Day.
Freedom First Rescue President Carlee Nelson found a novel way to vent your frustrations on Valentines Day: Have a rescue dog dole out that discontent for you, all the while benefitting that pooch and his or her pals.
For a $5 donation to Freedom First, a volunteer will write a name—it could be an ex, but the options pretty open—within a heart on a pee pad, and the rescue pups will take care of the rest.
That’s right, this Valentine’s Day, they’re “crapping on cupid,” as the rescue’s Facebook page put it.
Nelson said she got the idea from a similar effort with cats. Another rescue would write names in a litter box and have the kitties assert justice.
With dogs, she said, she had a little more opportunity for her and her staff to get creative.
“It’s first time we've done it, but it's been pretty great," Nelson said. "Everyone's been donating and getting names on there.
"A lot of people actually have just been donating because they think the fundraiser is so funny. And they're like, ‘I have no one to hate to put on this potty pad, but here's $10.’ So that's been pretty awesome."
Feb. 14 is the last day to join in on the fun, but you still can donate to the rescue via its website.
If you do make the cutoff, feel free to get a little sassy and creative yourself. After all, it’s in the spirit of the holiday—at least the way Nelson and her volunteers celebrate it.
“We could put anything on a pad—we’re not doing last names," Nelson said. "But if there's something that your ex would know, like an inside joke or something, we're more than happy to put that on a pad."
So, yes, love might stink. But hey, why not have fun with it this Valentine’s Day?
